come, son of jor-el! kneel before zod!

two things.

1.) i feel it's only fair to let everyone know...i have powers. it's taken me twenty-six years to realize my abilities, so today is quite momentous and i'm glad i have this blog as a record. remenber my scathing review of the mraz album and my story of the three year old? well, this morning at church, we had a guest speaker who used that EXACT EXAMPLE to illustrate a point. i was shocked to say the least. now the problem is understanding these newfound powers. did i a) predict what this speaker (whom i've never met) was going to say, or did i b) establish some sort of telepathic link to this guy during the week? there are pros for both options. if it's option a, then i may well be a modern nostradamus. this could definitely help my poker game. if it's option b, then i could potentially influence other people's minds and have them do my bidding. this also could help my poker game.

2.) poor bastard....


(disclaimer: snopes says this guy is not really named peter griffin. and for those who don't watch family guy, i do not expect you to understand why this is so freakin' sweet.)

i'm so enlightened, i can barely survive a night in my mind....

i think a lot about depth, which i suppose means i'm shallow. i wonder, am i deep? what is depth? is it a relative thing, like i can be more deep (deeper?) than billy, but less deep than sally? is it caring about political or global issues? because i'm really not deep then. is it being into philosophy or reading the classics? i fail those tests too.

being educated and all, i feel like i should be deep, but it's just not there. did i miss something important along the way? is this something i should strive for, or is it inherent in those who have it? i also feel like i want to be deep, but for very shallow reasons--so i can hang out with other deep people. these are the people i have in my mind as desirable to hang out with. i once thought that my aforementioned corduroy jacket and plastic frame glasses would be enough to weasel my way into their circles, but now i wonder if there is a requisite amount of depth needed to break in.

but maybe it's just me. maybe "they" don't really exist. i love my friends and i really don't need to try and find a new, different type of friend to hang out with. (i know i'm ending sentences with prepositions, but i like it better. thanks for reading!) i even have a friend who works at a coffee shop..that has to account for a couple inches of depth right?

two things that don't suck...and one that does

killing yourself to live by chuck klosterman
that's right, i read. his sex, drugs, and cocoa puffs is the funniest thing i've ever read...one of those where you're embarrassed when you start laughing loudly in the middle of an airplane. always uncomfortable. while this book is not as good as his first, it's definitely worth a read. anyone who picks it up hoping to learn about the advertised topic (a road trip to the sites of famous rockers' deaths) will be sorely disappointed. those (like me) who pick it up just to hear klosterman's voice should be pleased. i could have dealt without his drug addiction, but his relationship troubles are hilarious.

hustle & flow directed by craig brewer
ah, movies...something i'm much more comfortable reviewing. no one reading this probably remembers the original world of normalcy and the movie reviews therein. or its webmaster, the cheez. or the "x out of 7 weiners on a stick" rating system. those were the days.... anyway, i thought this movie was surprisingly good. i thought it would be just another rehash of the "pimp who wants to become a rapper" story (first put forth by austen i believe), but the cast made it their own. terrence howard is incredible in this movie. i was particularly impressed, as i had seen him earlier this year in crash playing a diametrically different character. add to that the trailer for the new 50 cent movie, and hustle & flow is a must see.

mr. a-z by jason mraz
wow...this is a tough one. not the review itself, as the album is plain terrible. but it hurts me to have to say bad things about my boy mraz. his live album from 2001 is one of my favorites, and waiting for my rocket to come was second only to mayer in cleverness. but this new new one...i tell you, i don't know if the entire cd is meant to be ironic or tongue-in-cheek or something, but i don't get it. let's say i'm the father of a three year old, and i give said three year old some crayons and a coloring book. on page one, he colors a hen. he uses the appropriate browns and reds, stays well within the lines, and even outlines in a darker shade! i'm so proud of my boy and i take his hen to work with me. later, he moves on to page two. he colors the clown (this is a strangely eclectic coloring book) with what seems to be every color in the box, and i can barely even see the clown under the frantic scribblings of my three year old. i still love my boy, but i won't be taking this clown to work. this analogy demonstrates two things. first, i will most likely be a terrible father, only satisfied when my child achieves perfection. second, mraz's new album is all over the place--different styles, paces, overly self referential, clever to the point of being cheesy--and though i still like him, i will not be taking his album to work with me.

life is both a major and a minor key, just open up the chord....

(reader's note: this post is incredibly sappy, but that's my mood. i'll talk about sports or barbecue or something next time.)

evolution is crazy. well, specifically, the evolution of relationships. over the past three days, i've been so surprised by friends. on the way to houston the other night, i stopped to have dinner with a friend i hadn't seen in a couple of months. she was originally a friend of my roommate, but i, being the friend slut that i am, took her on as mine as well. now he barely talks to her, and she's become one of my favorite people. we were only able to talk for an hour, but i felt like i could have seen her just the day before and we could have talked the same way. and i feel like if for some reason i'm not able to see her for a couple of years, we'd be able to talk the same way. to me, comfort is everything--and that's what i feel when i talk to her.

tonight, i was chatting with a good friend whom i talk to (text with?) everyday. in the span of a month, she has given me possibly the two greatest compliments i've ever received. we started hanging out with a bunch of friends through work, and i honestly thought she was a little strange until i started to really talk to her. now she too is one of my favorite people, and it kills me that she can say something so profound and make me feel like i deserve it. i'm blessed to have you as my friend, and i'm glad i don't think you're as weird anymore.... ;o)

also tonight, a friend called me to see if i wanted to catch a movie. sounds innocuous enough right? i can't even remember the last time i went to a movie with him...or even spent two hours with him doing anything. i thought he and i would be friends forever, but because of some pretty messed up stuff on his part, i don't feel like i can really talk to him anymore. it's not a good thing when someone's number shows up on your phone and you cringe before you answer it. i have no idea what's going to happen with us, but i'm so thankful i have the above two relationships (and others) to help balance it out.

i eat filet mignon seven times a day, my bathtub's filled with perrier....

i wanted to be a millionaire today. but apparently the scantron machine was particularly angry with me, as it chose to squash my dreams with no more thought than it gives to the miserable tests of my intro students. to catch everyone up, i tried out for who wants to be a millionaire and didn't even pass the written exam portion. and it was about movies, no less! who am i? what have i been doing my entire life? what am i if i can't answer thirty multiple choice questions about movies?

i'd say that at least i can fall back on my exceptional athletic prowess, but last night i rediscovered that i am the worst softball player in the history of the world. (i already knew that i am the worst basketball player of that same timeframe.) i went to watch a friend play and ended up getting called off the bleachers, as one of their players did not show. i actually caught the one fly hit my way. and then, in the final inning...2 out...2 on...i step to the plate...and hit a liner to third...to end the game. that's not how it's supposed to happen.

um, like, hi?

well...here i am again, catching onto a trend most likely entering its downswing. much like my other attempts to be cool with my "corduroy jacket" or my "black asics in 6th grade" or my "plastic frame glasses," it takes me a good while to catch up with the cool kids. am i ok with this? right now, at a little after midnight on a monday night, i don't feel too good about it. leave me to my own devices and i tend to spiral.

anyway, what should one expect from this blog? possibly accounts of my day, perhaps musings on the future, maybe some particularly low brow philosophy. but maybe not. can i write about people i know in these things? will they get mad at me? will they read this? what if i say good things about them...will they be mad that their business is out on the "web" for some random person to peruse? that remains to be seen.

if this plays out like most other things i start, i will leave it unfinished in a matter of weeks. (i tire of things easily.) is it my fault? is it the tv's? maybe one of those choose-your-own-adventure books? hmm...hopefully i'll be able to keep this going and not have to assign any blame. until next time....