i wanna shine on in the hearts of men....

(save this for later if you're not ready for bad news.)

my pastor died today. right in front of my eyes. right in front of his wife's eyes and those of the rest of congregation. we watched as he was pulled from the baptistry after being electrocuted in a freak accident. we watched as loved ones and then emergency medical technicians attended to him, trying to save his life. we watched, with tears in our eyes, as he was carted out of the church that he built. an hour later, we found out he had died.

i'm fine. i don't need consolation or to talk it out. i don't need to ask why, and i'm not angry at God. don't get me wrong; i've cried more today than just about any other day, and it's definitely in contention for the worst-day-of-my-life honor. he was a great man who deeply impacted my life. my theology, worldview, and life as a whole have changed considerably since i began attending his church, and those changes were in large part due to what he preached every week. and it is those changes that are getting me through this.

when i cry, it is for his wife who lost her thirty-three year old husband. it is for their three young children, who i pray will remember him. it is for the church that he built and that i call my home. they need God's grace and peace. please keep his family and church in your prayers.

friday random 10: coming home....

it's homecoming! woohoo! wait, that actually has absolutely no impact on my life. hmm...well it is the weekend, and i am excited about that. friend #1 is coming into town, i MIGHT go to the football game tomorrow, and we get to talk about garden stae at church this weekend. please itunes, tell me something good....

1. "Bigger than my Body" - John Mayer
2. "Wake Up" - Rage Against The Machine
3. "Our Love Is Loud" - David Crowder Band
4. "Indefinitely" - Travis
5. "Hurry Up And Wait" - Stereophonics
6. "Ready For The Rain" - Dime Store Prophets
7. "Ocean Song" - The Regulars
8. "Idyl for Strings - Adagio - Janacek" - Various Artists
9. "From Here You Can Almost See the Sea" - David Gray
10. "Ebay (Parody of "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys)" - "Weird Al" Yankovic

yikes! a bit of a water them with six, seven, and nine eh? no clue what those mean...atlanta is, like, far from the ocean and stuff, right? two is what i hope not to do when the stupid parade marches in front of my apartment. four is of course refering to my dissertation. ten might allude to the three hours of fiddling with my computer last night. if you want a new browser, check out mozilla firefox or opera, the mouse gestures are great!

i'm eating mangos in trinidad with attorneys....

several things...

1. i'm going to learn how to type! that's right, it takes me flippin' forever to write one of these things because i still hunt and peck for each key. i had to dictate any papers to my mom until i graduated high school and only became somewhat proficient at this hunting and pecking my sophomore year of college after hundreds of hours of chatting online. so now, seven years later, i think it's time. i have a monster paper ahead of me, so unless mom wants to move in with me for dictation purposes, i'm going to learn to look at screen and type.

2. #2 has done it again. today she surprised me with DAVID GRAY tickets! i'm unbelievably excited about this. she had hatched a great plan to surprise me with them, but i of course blew it with incessant questions and a compulsive need to plan. i was still very surprised. and this concert is just one week before i get to see HOOTIE play! it's gonna be a good month....

3. it's official...i'm moving to atlanta! can you believe it? i'm not sure that i can...it still hasn't completely hit me. a couple of weeks ago i had to suffer through an incredibly nerve-wracking phone interview. several things played into my nervousness: i've never had a real job interview, i hate talking on the phone, and i hate talking to strangers. i thought it went well overall...only a couple of silences (which is good for me) and i don't recall making any racist or sexist comments. a week later they made me an offer, and i accepted. so, as of january 4, 2006, i will be working as a research manager in atlanta, georgia. everyone is welcome to buy me goodbye gifts/meals before i go.... ok, to wrap up the random 10, number one would be for me to stay, but also to be happy, of course. two would have to be severely underpaid and unfathomably lonely. five is what i need when picking out a new huge tv for my new place. six is what i say to all my texas friends...i expect ALL of you to come see me. and finally, ten would be where i definitely don't want to live...unless i get a great deal....

friday random 10: i'm such a tease....

hey kids...i PROMISE another post today with full updates on my life. until then, here's the random 10 to whet your appetites. tonight i'm playing in a no-money poker game with some friends. (is that really poker though? hmm....) tomorrow i'm considering making a solo trip to the casinos, but i'd have to be home in time for the two HUGE games tomorrow night. (go horns and 'stros!)

1. "What You Want" - Caedmon's Call
2. "I Don't Want to Be" - Gavin DeGraw
3. "Love Song For No One" - John Mayer
4. "Gimme Stitches" - Foo Fighters
5. "Clarity" - John Mayer
6. "Don't Dream It's Over" - Crowded House
7. "The Lark Ascending or (Perhaps More Accurately, I'm Trying To Make You Sing)" - David Crowder Band
8. "Bach: Concerto for Violin, BMV 1042" - Pinchas Zuckerman & English Chamber Orchestra
9. "Sundown" - Elwood
10. "Ghetto" - P.O.D

it makes me very sad that number three is the first song to be played twice in the random 10. what are you telling me, itunes?! and what in the world am i to do with seven and eight? anyway, i'll try to work one, two, five, six, and ten into the today's second post.... :o)

friday random 10: argh!

sorry for the dearth of posts, yall. there's something i desperately want to tell you guys, but, for reasons beyond my control, i have to wait until next week to do it. in the meantime, you'll be happy to know that dissertating has picked up, and i'm pretty happy with the early results. this weekend, i think we're going to the local fair; i have an, um, appointment saturday morning; and we might hit up the HUGE football game saturday. let's see if the 10 can convince me....

1. "Last Goodbye" - Jeff Buckley
2. "Let's Get it On" - Gavin DeGraw
3. "Jesus Walks" - Kanye West
4. "Interstate" - The Refreshments
5. "At the Stars" - Howie Day
6. "Alibi" - David Gray
7. "0% Interest" - Jason Mraz
8. "Romeo On The Radio" - The Normals
9. "Nature's Backbeat" - Tribe America
10. "83" - John Mayer

hmmm...another off week. all i can think of is that hopefully we'll be saying number one to the huskers this weekend and then pointing them to number four. hopefully three will be more like "jesus runs it up the middle" come game time. six is what i'll need to cover up where i really am tomorrow morning. anybody else have anything that relates?

friday random 10: what happens when no good movies open in town?

so this weekend, my plans consist entirely of watching the ut-ou game and working on the dissertation. lame, but productive...hopefully.

1. "Side" -- Travis
2. "My Hope" -- David Crowder Band
3. "Everything Else" -- Howie Day
4. "Anna Begins" -- Counting Crows
5. "Walk on the Ocean (acoustic)" -- Toad The Wet Sprocket
6. "Isfahan" -- E.S. Posthumus
7. "No Sleep" -- Sam Roberts
8. "Cut It Ya Match It" -- Dispatch
9. "Reactionary" -- Umbrellas
10. "St. Patrick's Day" -- John Mayer

another off week for the random 10. two and seven could well refer to the bane of my existence: the dissertation. "my hope" is that i will one day finish this project, and "no sleep" is what it will take to do so. three is what i'm disregarding to get through it. six is...well i really don't know what six is. ten could foreshadow the celebration i'll be having tonight because of the news of this morning....